ruined

[dormant_dragon]

There comes a time, in every process of change, when something compels you to revisit the person you once were. I did that last night.

Am I scared by this tragic reminder? Yes.

Am I feeling like scum? Yes.

Am I determined never to go back there again? Yes.

Am I certain that at some point in the future, despite my best intentions, this will happen again? Yes.

Comments

[japester.livejournal.com]

Am I certain that at some point in the future, despite my best intentions, this will happen again? Yes.
why is that last word not a no?
the predelication of 'yes' creates an implicit destiny that you will go down that path and be scumworthy again.
So make sure your best intentions are enough. You have to believe that, otherwise they will not be, and never will be.

Never underestimate the power of the mind. In both its positive and negative aspects.

[dormant-dragon.livejournal.com]

On a day-to-day basis, my best intentions generally are enough.

At least when it's me that I'm trying to change.

[firvulag.livejournal.com]

That's where the determined not to go there bit comes in.

I've been there. I've fought to not go there. I've fallen back there. I've tried with all my will not to go back there, but i still know that it is still a likely possibility that i am weak and will fall again sometime.

my answere would certainly not be yes, but it also can't be no. it's the typically indefinite 'maybe'

[terrycat.livejournal.com]

Been there. Different thing, but oh so been there. Its not an addiction... addiction you can beat with willpower. Addiction ends eventually.

I havent done it in several years. I know the price if I ever do it again. I am almost physically nauseous at the thought of the things I did back then. But like you said...
"Am I certain that at some point in the future, despite my best intentions, this will happen again? Yes."
The only thing I hope for is that that point is so far in the future, it will no longer be relevant.